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ej0820
11-17-2010, 04:22 AM
hey there!

I did a search on here for this topic and found absolutely nothing. Makes me wonder if no one has this problem...

I have no desire for sex. At all. I don't have the energy for it, the interest, the stamina, the excitement...nothing. I feel TERRIBLE, and quite guilty about it, for my fiance. He always tells me that it doesn't matter and that he understands. I mean, we DO have sex, but I feel it's more often than not out of my feeling bad that we haven't done it in a while rather than because we are BOTH in the mood. I mean, there is certainly no way we are having it as normally as every other couple in their mid-twenties.

Do you guys (ladies <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> ) ever get this way? I'm never in the mood, and usually the thought of it gets me out of breath. Or I just don't want to start up because I know half way through we'll have to stop because I need to cough or catch my breath or something. Then I feel the mood is ruined even if I WAS into it. I mean, really, how sexy is that? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0"> I feel bad, too, because when we do have sex, he's almost ALWAYS the one doing all the work because I can't keep up. On my good days, I initiate it and can 'run with the torch' (sorry, lol), but I haven't had a good day in so long - especially since I got my port and have been continuously accessed.

I'm in a slump, I guess, and I don't know how to get out of it. I fear I never will get out of it because I can't see my lung function and energy getting so much better that we'll be doing it more regularly. I really do feel horrible for my fiance because I want to want to be with him intimately and be in the mood when he is. I want to feel sexy and please him and the energy is just never there anymore. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0">

I know a lot of medications can affect the libido, but I'm at the point where there probably won't come a time when I'm not on any medications. Also, how do you battle side effects? I've been on IVs for the last month that have made me sooo nauseous and tired. Who would want to have sex when all you feel like doing is throwing up? Even more so when you start coughing??

Any suggestions?

ej0820
11-17-2010, 04:22 AM
hey there!

I did a search on here for this topic and found absolutely nothing. Makes me wonder if no one has this problem...

I have no desire for sex. At all. I don't have the energy for it, the interest, the stamina, the excitement...nothing. I feel TERRIBLE, and quite guilty about it, for my fiance. He always tells me that it doesn't matter and that he understands. I mean, we DO have sex, but I feel it's more often than not out of my feeling bad that we haven't done it in a while rather than because we are BOTH in the mood. I mean, there is certainly no way we are having it as normally as every other couple in their mid-twenties.

Do you guys (ladies <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> ) ever get this way? I'm never in the mood, and usually the thought of it gets me out of breath. Or I just don't want to start up because I know half way through we'll have to stop because I need to cough or catch my breath or something. Then I feel the mood is ruined even if I WAS into it. I mean, really, how sexy is that? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0"> I feel bad, too, because when we do have sex, he's almost ALWAYS the one doing all the work because I can't keep up. On my good days, I initiate it and can 'run with the torch' (sorry, lol), but I haven't had a good day in so long - especially since I got my port and have been continuously accessed.

I'm in a slump, I guess, and I don't know how to get out of it. I fear I never will get out of it because I can't see my lung function and energy getting so much better that we'll be doing it more regularly. I really do feel horrible for my fiance because I want to want to be with him intimately and be in the mood when he is. I want to feel sexy and please him and the energy is just never there anymore. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0">

I know a lot of medications can affect the libido, but I'm at the point where there probably won't come a time when I'm not on any medications. Also, how do you battle side effects? I've been on IVs for the last month that have made me sooo nauseous and tired. Who would want to have sex when all you feel like doing is throwing up? Even more so when you start coughing??

Any suggestions?

ej0820
11-17-2010, 04:22 AM
hey there!
<br />
<br />I did a search on here for this topic and found absolutely nothing. Makes me wonder if no one has this problem...
<br />
<br />I have no desire for sex. At all. I don't have the energy for it, the interest, the stamina, the excitement...nothing. I feel TERRIBLE, and quite guilty about it, for my fiance. He always tells me that it doesn't matter and that he understands. I mean, we DO have sex, but I feel it's more often than not out of my feeling bad that we haven't done it in a while rather than because we are BOTH in the mood. I mean, there is certainly no way we are having it as normally as every other couple in their mid-twenties.
<br />
<br />Do you guys (ladies <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> ) ever get this way? I'm never in the mood, and usually the thought of it gets me out of breath. Or I just don't want to start up because I know half way through we'll have to stop because I need to cough or catch my breath or something. Then I feel the mood is ruined even if I WAS into it. I mean, really, how sexy is that? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0"> I feel bad, too, because when we do have sex, he's almost ALWAYS the one doing all the work because I can't keep up. On my good days, I initiate it and can 'run with the torch' (sorry, lol), but I haven't had a good day in so long - especially since I got my port and have been continuously accessed.
<br />
<br />I'm in a slump, I guess, and I don't know how to get out of it. I fear I never will get out of it because I can't see my lung function and energy getting so much better that we'll be doing it more regularly. I really do feel horrible for my fiance because I want to want to be with him intimately and be in the mood when he is. I want to feel sexy and please him and the energy is just never there anymore. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0">
<br />
<br />I know a lot of medications can affect the libido, but I'm at the point where there probably won't come a time when I'm not on any medications. Also, how do you battle side effects? I've been on IVs for the last month that have made me sooo nauseous and tired. Who would want to have sex when all you feel like doing is throwing up? Even more so when you start coughing??
<br />
<br />Any suggestions?

randomgirl
11-17-2010, 05:34 AM
I know EXACTLY how you feel and everything you described is like the same issues that my boyfriend and I go through. Except my boyfriend actually really likes doing stuff more than the average guy (at least <i>I</i> think so). So I feel so bad for feeling the opposite of how he feels. But unfortunately, I don't know what to do about it. Plus, I'm VERY uncomfortable with him beling close to me since my stomach is huuuge (due to cf and liver disease).

randomgirl
11-17-2010, 05:34 AM
I know EXACTLY how you feel and everything you described is like the same issues that my boyfriend and I go through. Except my boyfriend actually really likes doing stuff more than the average guy (at least <i>I</i> think so). So I feel so bad for feeling the opposite of how he feels. But unfortunately, I don't know what to do about it. Plus, I'm VERY uncomfortable with him beling close to me since my stomach is huuuge (due to cf and liver disease).

randomgirl
11-17-2010, 05:34 AM
I know EXACTLY how you feel and everything you described is like the same issues that my boyfriend and I go through. Except my boyfriend actually really likes doing stuff more than the average guy (at least <i>I</i> think so). So I feel so bad for feeling the opposite of how he feels. But unfortunately, I don't know what to do about it. Plus, I'm VERY uncomfortable with him beling close to me since my stomach is huuuge (due to cf and liver disease).

LouLou
11-17-2010, 11:45 AM
There definitely are threads on here about sex. I'll search after this and bump a few up. I've been with my hubby since 1998. We've gone through all different stages with sex. While libedo is effected by meds, agreed, I think the biggest factor is how busy you are in life (not just day to day ie. don't expect to be able to have lots of interest in sex on the weekends if you are in go mode all week). Healthy people may be able to do this but we need to have a lot of rest to be able to get to that point of enjoying sex. The time I felt as you describe I was busy wake to sleep. Now that I am home and more relaxed about my day I seem to enjoy sex and initiate it more.

A few ideas. If you aren't pleasuring yourself start now. The female body is attuned to needing orgasms more if it gets them more. Additionally, you'll get back in touch with your body in a harmoneous way not just administering poisonous drugs to it.

Recently a friend visited who gets orgasms every time from sex from the inside (g-spot?) not clitoral. I'm always amazed when I hear this from her so we chatted more and a few things I learned is she doesn't think about anything other than the sex that she is having and her partner's. Sometimes I don't want to kiss because I'm worried I'll make my husband sick or that my mouth will taste like mucus so now I brush and do mouthwash beforehand. Also, she is very attuned to her body. She explained directly all the energy down to her vagina and bam she orgasms. She also likes to be dominated. They mostly have sex in the morning. Perhaps you have more energy in the am or you feel better doing it while vesting. Think outside the box. I don't think you need to feel like you are not into it because of your physical shape. Can you lay on your back or does it cause immediate coughing or hemopytsis? If so use pillows to prop yourself up or do it standing. You can move your hips and be very into it without a lot of physical excertion :-) Have you had sex in all the rooms of your house? This will cause you to get creative :-) Also consider either going to a toy store or hosting a Passion Party.

And yes sex is necessary for a healthy relationship. I think any marital counselor will tell you that it needs to be a priority. Obviously in periods of extreme sickness it should be understandable that you are not interested but if more often than not throughout the year you don't want to or just aren't having sex then you should probably work on this.

LouLou
11-17-2010, 11:45 AM
There definitely are threads on here about sex. I'll search after this and bump a few up. I've been with my hubby since 1998. We've gone through all different stages with sex. While libedo is effected by meds, agreed, I think the biggest factor is how busy you are in life (not just day to day ie. don't expect to be able to have lots of interest in sex on the weekends if you are in go mode all week). Healthy people may be able to do this but we need to have a lot of rest to be able to get to that point of enjoying sex. The time I felt as you describe I was busy wake to sleep. Now that I am home and more relaxed about my day I seem to enjoy sex and initiate it more.

A few ideas. If you aren't pleasuring yourself start now. The female body is attuned to needing orgasms more if it gets them more. Additionally, you'll get back in touch with your body in a harmoneous way not just administering poisonous drugs to it.

Recently a friend visited who gets orgasms every time from sex from the inside (g-spot?) not clitoral. I'm always amazed when I hear this from her so we chatted more and a few things I learned is she doesn't think about anything other than the sex that she is having and her partner's. Sometimes I don't want to kiss because I'm worried I'll make my husband sick or that my mouth will taste like mucus so now I brush and do mouthwash beforehand. Also, she is very attuned to her body. She explained directly all the energy down to her vagina and bam she orgasms. She also likes to be dominated. They mostly have sex in the morning. Perhaps you have more energy in the am or you feel better doing it while vesting. Think outside the box. I don't think you need to feel like you are not into it because of your physical shape. Can you lay on your back or does it cause immediate coughing or hemopytsis? If so use pillows to prop yourself up or do it standing. You can move your hips and be very into it without a lot of physical excertion :-) Have you had sex in all the rooms of your house? This will cause you to get creative :-) Also consider either going to a toy store or hosting a Passion Party.

And yes sex is necessary for a healthy relationship. I think any marital counselor will tell you that it needs to be a priority. Obviously in periods of extreme sickness it should be understandable that you are not interested but if more often than not throughout the year you don't want to or just aren't having sex then you should probably work on this.

LouLou
11-17-2010, 11:45 AM
There definitely are threads on here about sex. I'll search after this and bump a few up. I've been with my hubby since 1998. We've gone through all different stages with sex. While libedo is effected by meds, agreed, I think the biggest factor is how busy you are in life (not just day to day ie. don't expect to be able to have lots of interest in sex on the weekends if you are in go mode all week). Healthy people may be able to do this but we need to have a lot of rest to be able to get to that point of enjoying sex. The time I felt as you describe I was busy wake to sleep. Now that I am home and more relaxed about my day I seem to enjoy sex and initiate it more.
<br />
<br />A few ideas. If you aren't pleasuring yourself start now. The female body is attuned to needing orgasms more if it gets them more. Additionally, you'll get back in touch with your body in a harmoneous way not just administering poisonous drugs to it.
<br />
<br />Recently a friend visited who gets orgasms every time from sex from the inside (g-spot?) not clitoral. I'm always amazed when I hear this from her so we chatted more and a few things I learned is she doesn't think about anything other than the sex that she is having and her partner's. Sometimes I don't want to kiss because I'm worried I'll make my husband sick or that my mouth will taste like mucus so now I brush and do mouthwash beforehand. Also, she is very attuned to her body. She explained directly all the energy down to her vagina and bam she orgasms. She also likes to be dominated. They mostly have sex in the morning. Perhaps you have more energy in the am or you feel better doing it while vesting. Think outside the box. I don't think you need to feel like you are not into it because of your physical shape. Can you lay on your back or does it cause immediate coughing or hemopytsis? If so use pillows to prop yourself up or do it standing. You can move your hips and be very into it without a lot of physical excertion :-) Have you had sex in all the rooms of your house? This will cause you to get creative :-) Also consider either going to a toy store or hosting a Passion Party.
<br />
<br />And yes sex is necessary for a healthy relationship. I think any marital counselor will tell you that it needs to be a priority. Obviously in periods of extreme sickness it should be understandable that you are not interested but if more often than not throughout the year you don't want to or just aren't having sex then you should probably work on this.

entropy
11-17-2010, 12:01 PM
Hmm... I'm a 20 year old male and I still have a strong desire to have sex even though my lung function isn't nearly as good as other people my age. I know you've geared your questions toward women, but I must say, I think that men have the harder job when it comes to sex. Women have the OPTION to just lie there while men do all the work. Maybe you can consider doing the missionary position for your boyfriend. It's a way to save energy; you can lie there and let your man do everything while still enjoying the physical stimulation.

entropy
11-17-2010, 12:01 PM
Hmm... I'm a 20 year old male and I still have a strong desire to have sex even though my lung function isn't nearly as good as other people my age. I know you've geared your questions toward women, but I must say, I think that men have the harder job when it comes to sex. Women have the OPTION to just lie there while men do all the work. Maybe you can consider doing the missionary position for your boyfriend. It's a way to save energy; you can lie there and let your man do everything while still enjoying the physical stimulation.

entropy
11-17-2010, 12:01 PM
Hmm... I'm a 20 year old male and I still have a strong desire to have sex even though my lung function isn't nearly as good as other people my age. I know you've geared your questions toward women, but I must say, I think that men have the harder job when it comes to sex. Women have the OPTION to just lie there while men do all the work. Maybe you can consider doing the missionary position for your boyfriend. It's a way to save energy; you can lie there and let your man do everything while still enjoying the physical stimulation.

MCGrad2006
11-17-2010, 12:28 PM
I have the same problem as you are describing. I am 26 and feel absolutely no desire. I wish that it would were better because I feel bad for my fiancee. I am glad I am not the only one. We do have sex, but it always feels planned out, its never spontaneous and I just wish sometimes I felt like being spontaneous. I know part of that is the whole being busy and not really having time/energy to be spontaneous.

I wish I had some advice, but I think this thread is a good idea. I hope that you hear from more people.

MCGrad2006
11-17-2010, 12:28 PM
I have the same problem as you are describing. I am 26 and feel absolutely no desire. I wish that it would were better because I feel bad for my fiancee. I am glad I am not the only one. We do have sex, but it always feels planned out, its never spontaneous and I just wish sometimes I felt like being spontaneous. I know part of that is the whole being busy and not really having time/energy to be spontaneous.

I wish I had some advice, but I think this thread is a good idea. I hope that you hear from more people.

MCGrad2006
11-17-2010, 12:28 PM
I have the same problem as you are describing. I am 26 and feel absolutely no desire. I wish that it would were better because I feel bad for my fiancee. I am glad I am not the only one. We do have sex, but it always feels planned out, its never spontaneous and I just wish sometimes I felt like being spontaneous. I know part of that is the whole being busy and not really having time/energy to be spontaneous.
<br />
<br />I wish I had some advice, but I think this thread is a good idea. I hope that you hear from more people.

Proxy
11-17-2010, 03:19 PM
I notice a big decline in my desire when im going through a sick spell,my desire seems to depend alot on how I feel but also how I think I look, If im sick and wearing oxygen I am far from feeling desireble especially when it gets in the way.
LouLous post was filled with lots of helpful info <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
I just try to make up for the lack of sex when im feeling good, having a understanding and patient partner helps heaps as well <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">and also getting into my head that when im naked hes not looking at my oxygen tubes, his mind is on other things lol.
And Entropy I think the Cowgirl position would be one in which the guy could just lay there <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0">

Proxy
11-17-2010, 03:19 PM
I notice a big decline in my desire when im going through a sick spell,my desire seems to depend alot on how I feel but also how I think I look, If im sick and wearing oxygen I am far from feeling desireble especially when it gets in the way.
LouLous post was filled with lots of helpful info <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
I just try to make up for the lack of sex when im feeling good, having a understanding and patient partner helps heaps as well <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">and also getting into my head that when im naked hes not looking at my oxygen tubes, his mind is on other things lol.
And Entropy I think the Cowgirl position would be one in which the guy could just lay there <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0">

Proxy
11-17-2010, 03:19 PM
I notice a big decline in my desire when im going through a sick spell,my desire seems to depend alot on how I feel but also how I think I look, If im sick and wearing oxygen I am far from feeling desireble especially when it gets in the way.
<br />LouLous post was filled with lots of helpful info <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
<br />I just try to make up for the lack of sex when im feeling good, having a understanding and patient partner helps heaps as well <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">and also getting into my head that when im naked hes not looking at my oxygen tubes, his mind is on other things lol.
<br />And Entropy I think the Cowgirl position would be one in which the guy could just lay there <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0">

sarabeth87
11-17-2010, 08:58 PM
From talking to my friends that don't have CF, I would say that this affects all women. I think in the beginning of relationships there is gonna be a lot of desire, but once we get used to our partner, the desire fizzles out. I am with the guy that I've had the hugest crush on since I was 13 and I'm still madly in love with him, but for the most part I could care less about sex, even if I'm feeling well. Of course being sick doesn't help at all. I have to force myself to be "in the mood" because if we only did it when I wanted it, we'd probably only do it a couple times a year lol.

sarabeth87
11-17-2010, 08:58 PM
From talking to my friends that don't have CF, I would say that this affects all women. I think in the beginning of relationships there is gonna be a lot of desire, but once we get used to our partner, the desire fizzles out. I am with the guy that I've had the hugest crush on since I was 13 and I'm still madly in love with him, but for the most part I could care less about sex, even if I'm feeling well. Of course being sick doesn't help at all. I have to force myself to be "in the mood" because if we only did it when I wanted it, we'd probably only do it a couple times a year lol.

sarabeth87
11-17-2010, 08:58 PM
From talking to my friends that don't have CF, I would say that this affects all women. I think in the beginning of relationships there is gonna be a lot of desire, but once we get used to our partner, the desire fizzles out. I am with the guy that I've had the hugest crush on since I was 13 and I'm still madly in love with him, but for the most part I could care less about sex, even if I'm feeling well. Of course being sick doesn't help at all. I have to force myself to be "in the mood" because if we only did it when I wanted it, we'd probably only do it a couple times a year lol.

sarabeth87
11-17-2010, 09:01 PM
I forgot to add: This same thing happened to me in my first marriage too. I thought I felt this way because I was so unhappy with the marriage and I "disliked" my husband very much. I was sure I wouldn't ever feel this way about my current husband, but now I don't want to have sex with him most of the time either.

sarabeth87
11-17-2010, 09:01 PM
I forgot to add: This same thing happened to me in my first marriage too. I thought I felt this way because I was so unhappy with the marriage and I "disliked" my husband very much. I was sure I wouldn't ever feel this way about my current husband, but now I don't want to have sex with him most of the time either.

sarabeth87
11-17-2010, 09:01 PM
I forgot to add: This same thing happened to me in my first marriage too. I thought I felt this way because I was so unhappy with the marriage and I "disliked" my husband very much. I was sure I wouldn't ever feel this way about my current husband, but now I don't want to have sex with him most of the time either.

AimeeSue82
11-19-2010, 03:47 AM
Obviously the OP is not alone in this situation! I too have libido problems, but I've heard many times that the more sex you have, the more you want it. My bf would have sex several times a day if it were up to him! I limit him because I don't have the energy for that. But because he knows I'm tired all the time, he's more than willing to do more than his fair share of work so he can get some lovin. He does most of the foreplay work then most of the actual work too and just lets me lay there. But of course, once we're into it I help some too. If I have to cough, I tell him to stop a second and I cough. Or we stop and I have a coughing fit, then we resume. He knows that comes with the territory of CF. He really loves you so although you may not think the port access or the coughing is sexy, he barely registers it. He wants to be with you. If it helps, go VERY slowly so you don't get out of breath, you don't have to pump away! Or do a treatment immediatly beforehand. Talk to your fiance, I'm sure he's willing to do anything you need/want to make it easier for you.

~Aimee, 28 CF w/ PA & MRSA

AimeeSue82
11-19-2010, 03:47 AM
Obviously the OP is not alone in this situation! I too have libido problems, but I've heard many times that the more sex you have, the more you want it. My bf would have sex several times a day if it were up to him! I limit him because I don't have the energy for that. But because he knows I'm tired all the time, he's more than willing to do more than his fair share of work so he can get some lovin. He does most of the foreplay work then most of the actual work too and just lets me lay there. But of course, once we're into it I help some too. If I have to cough, I tell him to stop a second and I cough. Or we stop and I have a coughing fit, then we resume. He knows that comes with the territory of CF. He really loves you so although you may not think the port access or the coughing is sexy, he barely registers it. He wants to be with you. If it helps, go VERY slowly so you don't get out of breath, you don't have to pump away! Or do a treatment immediatly beforehand. Talk to your fiance, I'm sure he's willing to do anything you need/want to make it easier for you.

~Aimee, 28 CF w/ PA & MRSA

AimeeSue82
11-19-2010, 03:47 AM
Obviously the OP is not alone in this situation! I too have libido problems, but I've heard many times that the more sex you have, the more you want it. My bf would have sex several times a day if it were up to him! I limit him because I don't have the energy for that. But because he knows I'm tired all the time, he's more than willing to do more than his fair share of work so he can get some lovin. He does most of the foreplay work then most of the actual work too and just lets me lay there. But of course, once we're into it I help some too. If I have to cough, I tell him to stop a second and I cough. Or we stop and I have a coughing fit, then we resume. He knows that comes with the territory of CF. He really loves you so although you may not think the port access or the coughing is sexy, he barely registers it. He wants to be with you. If it helps, go VERY slowly so you don't get out of breath, you don't have to pump away! Or do a treatment immediatly beforehand. Talk to your fiance, I'm sure he's willing to do anything you need/want to make it easier for you.
<br />
<br />~Aimee, 28 CF w/ PA & MRSA

falloutboygurl16
11-19-2010, 05:17 AM
i used to have this problem and im pretty sure it was due to taking antidepressants/antianxiety meds.
but then again maybe not.
with my last boyfriend i was REALLLY not in the mood sexually at all and i felt like if we did do anything it was for him as well because hes a guy and he "needs" it.
anyways i havent taken my antidepressants/anxiety meds because of my trying to control it on my own without having more drugs!
my sex drive is actually really good right now.
but then again it may be because ive got a new bf who i find more attractive physically and emotionally. also the emotional attachment is just amazing! so i dont know if that has anything to do with it you know?
when i am sick or even hooked up via port im still sexually active just as much.

when it comes to sex i like to be the one in control too because i find it more satisfying for him when im doing the work...sometimes i cant tho because of being really congested or having lots of problems breathing.
MORESO after breathing treatments and feeling amazing because of being able to breathe makes sex more enjoyable too.
my boyfriend always makes sure im okay and that i am breathing okay but he just asks and usually understands im fine.
ahah im sure he finds me sexy even with nice medical equipment hooked up. haha. :]

when im really tired from ivs i TRY really hard to stay up just to be intimate. but if i am too tired and do pass out he does realize im sick and i need rest. although i make time for our relationship too.

falloutboygurl16
11-19-2010, 05:17 AM
i used to have this problem and im pretty sure it was due to taking antidepressants/antianxiety meds.
but then again maybe not.
with my last boyfriend i was REALLLY not in the mood sexually at all and i felt like if we did do anything it was for him as well because hes a guy and he "needs" it.
anyways i havent taken my antidepressants/anxiety meds because of my trying to control it on my own without having more drugs!
my sex drive is actually really good right now.
but then again it may be because ive got a new bf who i find more attractive physically and emotionally. also the emotional attachment is just amazing! so i dont know if that has anything to do with it you know?
when i am sick or even hooked up via port im still sexually active just as much.

when it comes to sex i like to be the one in control too because i find it more satisfying for him when im doing the work...sometimes i cant tho because of being really congested or having lots of problems breathing.
MORESO after breathing treatments and feeling amazing because of being able to breathe makes sex more enjoyable too.
my boyfriend always makes sure im okay and that i am breathing okay but he just asks and usually understands im fine.
ahah im sure he finds me sexy even with nice medical equipment hooked up. haha. :]

when im really tired from ivs i TRY really hard to stay up just to be intimate. but if i am too tired and do pass out he does realize im sick and i need rest. although i make time for our relationship too.

falloutboygurl16
11-19-2010, 05:17 AM
i used to have this problem and im pretty sure it was due to taking antidepressants/antianxiety meds.
<br />but then again maybe not.
<br />with my last boyfriend i was REALLLY not in the mood sexually at all and i felt like if we did do anything it was for him as well because hes a guy and he "needs" it.
<br />anyways i havent taken my antidepressants/anxiety meds because of my trying to control it on my own without having more drugs!
<br />my sex drive is actually really good right now.
<br />but then again it may be because ive got a new bf who i find more attractive physically and emotionally. also the emotional attachment is just amazing! so i dont know if that has anything to do with it you know?
<br />when i am sick or even hooked up via port im still sexually active just as much.
<br />
<br />when it comes to sex i like to be the one in control too because i find it more satisfying for him when im doing the work...sometimes i cant tho because of being really congested or having lots of problems breathing.
<br />MORESO after breathing treatments and feeling amazing because of being able to breathe makes sex more enjoyable too.
<br />my boyfriend always makes sure im okay and that i am breathing okay but he just asks and usually understands im fine.
<br />ahah im sure he finds me sexy even with nice medical equipment hooked up. haha. :]
<br />
<br />when im really tired from ivs i TRY really hard to stay up just to be intimate. but if i am too tired and do pass out he does realize im sick and i need rest. although i make time for our relationship too.

windex125
11-20-2010, 03:50 PM
Wow these were all great suggestions, I hope you all walked away with something new to think abt. but probably as the oldest making a comment here. I will say sex does not always have to mean pentration and hard work. Bathing together is a very nice relaxing feeling, body massages with oil for each other, which of course can lead or not lead to further stimmulation. I do remember those days of getting on my man and riding like a horse the lust and passion are a very good memory for sure.But now things changed the IV port /o2 as well but the coughing is worse then it's ever been. I am amazed still at times at the amt.of junk we generate. Anyway getting off course here. I liked alot of LouLou suggestions as well. Plus age has changed my interest and of course my energy level is not what it used to be. But I still do things to let him know how special he is sometimes I will vaccum topless which he still enjoys looking at my breats even though they aren't as perky as they used to be. I always smell good, my hair is always done. Caring for yourself/body comes first. Please don't feel oh I am sick it doesn't matter what I look like it does, we all know the mental strength in us and our will power to stay well it makes a difference. Also postions are a big factor how abt.him sitting on a chair and you sitting on top of him works well actually better than laying down probably.I know you mentioned he is understanding, and bless him for that but honestly with men it really is abt alot of sex and stimmulation I just have to be honest abt that. Good luck to you. Pat-55/CF

windex125
11-20-2010, 03:50 PM
Wow these were all great suggestions, I hope you all walked away with something new to think abt. but probably as the oldest making a comment here. I will say sex does not always have to mean pentration and hard work. Bathing together is a very nice relaxing feeling, body massages with oil for each other, which of course can lead or not lead to further stimmulation. I do remember those days of getting on my man and riding like a horse the lust and passion are a very good memory for sure.But now things changed the IV port /o2 as well but the coughing is worse then it's ever been. I am amazed still at times at the amt.of junk we generate. Anyway getting off course here. I liked alot of LouLou suggestions as well. Plus age has changed my interest and of course my energy level is not what it used to be. But I still do things to let him know how special he is sometimes I will vaccum topless which he still enjoys looking at my breats even though they aren't as perky as they used to be. I always smell good, my hair is always done. Caring for yourself/body comes first. Please don't feel oh I am sick it doesn't matter what I look like it does, we all know the mental strength in us and our will power to stay well it makes a difference. Also postions are a big factor how abt.him sitting on a chair and you sitting on top of him works well actually better than laying down probably.I know you mentioned he is understanding, and bless him for that but honestly with men it really is abt alot of sex and stimmulation I just have to be honest abt that. Good luck to you. Pat-55/CF

windex125
11-20-2010, 03:50 PM
Wow these were all great suggestions, I hope you all walked away with something new to think abt. but probably as the oldest making a comment here. I will say sex does not always have to mean pentration and hard work. Bathing together is a very nice relaxing feeling, body massages with oil for each other, which of course can lead or not lead to further stimmulation. I do remember those days of getting on my man and riding like a horse the lust and passion are a very good memory for sure.But now things changed the IV port /o2 as well but the coughing is worse then it's ever been. I am amazed still at times at the amt.of junk we generate. Anyway getting off course here. I liked alot of LouLou suggestions as well. Plus age has changed my interest and of course my energy level is not what it used to be. But I still do things to let him know how special he is sometimes I will vaccum topless which he still enjoys looking at my breats even though they aren't as perky as they used to be. I always smell good, my hair is always done. Caring for yourself/body comes first. Please don't feel oh I am sick it doesn't matter what I look like it does, we all know the mental strength in us and our will power to stay well it makes a difference. Also postions are a big factor how abt.him sitting on a chair and you sitting on top of him works well actually better than laying down probably.I know you mentioned he is understanding, and bless him for that but honestly with men it really is abt alot of sex and stimmulation I just have to be honest abt that. Good luck to you. Pat-55/CF

sue35
11-21-2010, 02:12 PM
This makes me feel so much better that there are other people out there like me. I never am "in the mood". It really does just seem like a chore to me because I know I will be tired and coughing. I feel horrible for my fiance. Nothing I try seems to help. I get worried because if this is happening at 28 then who knows what I will be later in life.

sue35
11-21-2010, 02:12 PM
This makes me feel so much better that there are other people out there like me. I never am "in the mood". It really does just seem like a chore to me because I know I will be tired and coughing. I feel horrible for my fiance. Nothing I try seems to help. I get worried because if this is happening at 28 then who knows what I will be later in life.

sue35
11-21-2010, 02:12 PM
This makes me feel so much better that there are other people out there like me. I never am "in the mood". It really does just seem like a chore to me because I know I will be tired and coughing. I feel horrible for my fiance. Nothing I try seems to help. I get worried because if this is happening at 28 then who knows what I will be later in life.

GrantsWife
11-21-2010, 02:28 PM
Well I am not the one with CF but my hubby is. I don't think I have ever noticed him letting his disease get in the way of sex. The only thing that does seem to affect it though is either him being too tired from work or he is actually very sick. I agree that it is a very important thing to have sex in a marriage when you both feel well, it keeps the relationship healthy. I know as I stated that I don't have CF but as a woman I think I can say that there are times that I too have had sex with hubby just because we hadn't had any in a while and didn't want him to go without. It is just that life gets a hold of me and sometimes just feel comfortable with myself or my body. I am sure the same goes for women with CF. Just know that you are all beautiful and obviously loved. Try not to worry so much about what your spouse or partner thinks. If they love you, they will wait until you feel up to par. All I know is that hubby seems to enjoy sex more when we have gone without it for a while because he thinks it is great exercise for clearing his lungs. It is fun for both of us and in turn is keeping hubby healthy which is great for us. And also if you need to take a break to cough, so be it. You have CF and I know from being a spouse myself that anything my hubby has to do, I understand and respect so I am sure yours will as well.

Sorry I can't provide you with more help or advice but I can only do so from the other side of the equation. I hope things look up for you in this department and that you find others to relate with. Hopefully everyone finds something that works well for them.

GrantsWife
11-21-2010, 02:28 PM
Well I am not the one with CF but my hubby is. I don't think I have ever noticed him letting his disease get in the way of sex. The only thing that does seem to affect it though is either him being too tired from work or he is actually very sick. I agree that it is a very important thing to have sex in a marriage when you both feel well, it keeps the relationship healthy. I know as I stated that I don't have CF but as a woman I think I can say that there are times that I too have had sex with hubby just because we hadn't had any in a while and didn't want him to go without. It is just that life gets a hold of me and sometimes just feel comfortable with myself or my body. I am sure the same goes for women with CF. Just know that you are all beautiful and obviously loved. Try not to worry so much about what your spouse or partner thinks. If they love you, they will wait until you feel up to par. All I know is that hubby seems to enjoy sex more when we have gone without it for a while because he thinks it is great exercise for clearing his lungs. It is fun for both of us and in turn is keeping hubby healthy which is great for us. And also if you need to take a break to cough, so be it. You have CF and I know from being a spouse myself that anything my hubby has to do, I understand and respect so I am sure yours will as well.

Sorry I can't provide you with more help or advice but I can only do so from the other side of the equation. I hope things look up for you in this department and that you find others to relate with. Hopefully everyone finds something that works well for them.

GrantsWife
11-21-2010, 02:28 PM
Well I am not the one with CF but my hubby is. I don't think I have ever noticed him letting his disease get in the way of sex. The only thing that does seem to affect it though is either him being too tired from work or he is actually very sick. I agree that it is a very important thing to have sex in a marriage when you both feel well, it keeps the relationship healthy. I know as I stated that I don't have CF but as a woman I think I can say that there are times that I too have had sex with hubby just because we hadn't had any in a while and didn't want him to go without. It is just that life gets a hold of me and sometimes just feel comfortable with myself or my body. I am sure the same goes for women with CF. Just know that you are all beautiful and obviously loved. Try not to worry so much about what your spouse or partner thinks. If they love you, they will wait until you feel up to par. All I know is that hubby seems to enjoy sex more when we have gone without it for a while because he thinks it is great exercise for clearing his lungs. It is fun for both of us and in turn is keeping hubby healthy which is great for us. And also if you need to take a break to cough, so be it. You have CF and I know from being a spouse myself that anything my hubby has to do, I understand and respect so I am sure yours will as well.
<br />
<br />Sorry I can't provide you with more help or advice but I can only do so from the other side of the equation. I hope things look up for you in this department and that you find others to relate with. Hopefully everyone finds something that works well for them.