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anonymous
03-01-2005, 08:17 PM
I know a young girl who has CF and her mother smokes. (She doesnt smoke around her child) I feel like saying to the mother, "Its because of peolple like you (smokers) that CF people cant (shouldnt) go into public places that allow smoking." (bowling alleys, bars, some restaurants etc) I have to say that this really bothers me. I feel like its the mother who should be doing treatments and on oxygen. By smoking thats what you are asking for. The person with CF never did anything to deserve what they have to go through. Anyway, I was wondering what others views are on this subject. Thank you.

anonymous
03-01-2005, 08:40 PM
My BF(CF) parents both smoke even when he was little they sometimes even smoked in the car on trips I think that it is disgusting and I couldn't believe that they actually smoke around him now that he is older he has goes at them and tells them off. I hate smokers I can't wait for them to ban them in bars and clubs here as it really puts me off going out.

ClashPunk82
03-01-2005, 09:46 PM
I am so grateful I live in MA. Smoking is banned from all public places it's so great that I can go to a bowling alley or a pool hall and not throw up after I leave because of all the smoke!! Smoking makes me so mad and I wish it was banned altogether.

NoDayButToday
03-01-2005, 10:50 PM
If you don't intentionally smoke around me, it doesn't bother me if a person smokes.

If they get emphysema or lung cancer, I would feel some priority over them in terms of a lung transplant. I think smoking in public places should be banned (it pretty much is around me though, so I don't think about that one much), and it irks me when I walk by a smoker who is giving off a lot of smoke (some seem smell smokier than others), but smokers in themselves, as people, I have no problem with. In this day and age, they very well know what they are getting into, and its their choice. I sometimes think, If you want bad lungs I'll trade you; but smokers aren't doing it to ruin their lungs, nicotine is a thing that has pleasurable affects, and that's what smokers are going after. It's their choice, and no one gets angry at alcoholics who rot away their livers it seems, though its the same concept.

I guess I'm saying I don't look down on smokers, so long as they don't smoke around me. Oh and those commercials where we're supposed to cry over a man dying of emphysema, they bother me.

AngieM
03-02-2005, 12:56 AM
I also have a "thing" with smokers. I think about my 10 yr old stepdaughter who has CF. When shes older... will she not be able to go into places b/c of smokers?? I know now we don't go places b/c of the smoke factor. I hope she makes the choice of not wanting to be around it. But if smoking were banned in poublic places them that would allow her more "freedom". Is there any Cfers out there who have experienced being held back from a place b/c of smoking?? How does it make you feel?

Angie

anonymous
03-02-2005, 02:34 AM
All of my friends smoke but they respect me when I am around. I think my going to the smokey bars has declined my health a lot over the years. I live i Madison WI and they are banning smoking from all public places in june 2005. I am pumped about that! Nate

anonymous
03-02-2005, 09:56 AM
coll,

well said...are you sure you are fifteen? I would just add that in WV it is a county by county decision, the county where I live smoking is banned eveywhere but bars. I will tell you that I do not feel sorry for smokers when they get sick and find it ridiculus they can sue tobacco companies for the damage their smoking caused. Who can we sue for our problems, our parents????


luke 29/cf, fifteen days and counting

serendipity730
03-02-2005, 11:33 AM
I think smokers generally fall into two categories - respectful smokers and unrespectful smokers. My fiancee's parents are smokers (well his dad is trying to quit.) And, if his dad hadn't told his mom that they were never going to smoke in the house when I am there, I think she still would have. I had a friend growing up whose mom smoked like a chimney - even around me! It always blew my mind. I wish they would ban it in public places. There are some bars that I just don't go to anymore, because it is too smokey. I'd like to think I take the high road like Coll, butt sometimes it is just really angering that we fight to keep the lungs we have healthy (and eventually fail,) when others are smoking theirs away.

Dea
03-02-2005, 12:55 PM
I am 31...was diagnosed at just a few months old. My mom and dad both smoked around me and my brother (also with CF) when we were kids. I still dont understand why they did it. It makes me mad too about smoking in restaurants and bowling alleys. I cant even go bowling without being around smoke. Smoking has been banned in alot of fast food places now...but a family place like a bowling alley, they can still smoke. Doesnt make any sense to me!
Dea

NoDayButToday
03-02-2005, 01:25 PM
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr>well said...are you sure you are fifteen? <hr></blockquote>

Yep, I'm 15 Luke.... 16 in April. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

AngieM
03-02-2005, 02:51 PM
I wondering..... even if someone doesnt smoke around you , does still effect your lungs. For example... being in a car that gets smoked in. Walking thriough a garage that gets smoked in. You can still smell that disgusting smoky smell even though there's no smoke in the air. Would this effect a CFers lungs??

Mockingbird
03-02-2005, 05:16 PM
Hey, Angie. I know getting into a smoke smelling car or being around someone who smells like it affects my lungs. I think it might just be a psychological thing, though; I'm not sure if it actaully physically hurts my lungs.

I can't believe a parent of a cfer would smoke... seems like a confict of interest, to me. =-) "I love my baby soooo much! okay, i need to go smoke now." That would drive me insane, being around someone like that. Even though she doesn't smoke around her daughter, I still think it's wrong.

Jarod
22 w/cf

thefrogprincess
03-02-2005, 05:37 PM
My dad has been a smoker for about 30 years. He always smoked outside and never ever in the car, even if we weren't in it because just the smell would bother us.

The state of Washington is trying to ban smoking in public places and I hope it passes. I get very resentful sometimes because I don't get to hang out with my BF and friends when they go to a bar, or to see my friend's band. There aren't even any non-smoking bars around here to go to.

Just another note: and not that I'm defending smokers. Most people don't understand how hard it is to quit. As an example my grandfather smoked for most of his life, got lung cancer of course and smoked right up until the very end, same with my BFs grandpa. My dad has tried to quit more times than I remember, even though my grandpa (mom's dad) had cancer, and his dad and oldest brother have had heart attacks he keeps on going. My BFs aunt has emphazema (sp??). On the fourth of July she sat there with a ciggarette in one hand and an inhaler in the other. So don't get too upset with people as long as they aren't smoking around CFers. They are probably trying to quit, and they need support, not anger.

anonymous
03-04-2005, 02:01 AM
Smoking is the #1 addictive drug and it is very hard to quit, just because one smokes does not imply that they do not love or care about their children, i agree that it is a filthy and smelly habit, but i think that there is nobody that is perfect and nobody should judge others because we all have some sort of bad habit. Some people smoke, some drink alcohol and some do drugs. i think that i read on this site that someone was asking about cocaine and CF, and by the way i lost a parent to alcoholism, and it sounds like alot of CF people like to drink.

Emily65Roses
03-04-2005, 02:33 AM
Smoking doesn't imply people don't love their children, no. But smoking inside the same house, or inside a closed car does.

jenhum
03-04-2005, 03:20 AM
Just because something is hard to do doesn't mean it's impossible.

Btw, it's ridiculous to say that most cfers like to drink a lot. The reason a lot ofpeople on this site do or have is b/c there are a lot of teenagers/young 20's, which is when a lot of people start drinking. And just so you know, I don't drink at all.

Also, I am VERY sorry that you lost a parent to alcohol, but their drinking did not make your health worse. A parent that smokes does make their child's health worse, especially if that child has CF.


Enough from me. I think everyone probably knows my stance on smoking by now.....

Emily65Roses
03-04-2005, 03:22 AM
You're right, Jenny, I'm sure everyone knows. But I just so happen to agree with you 100%. So it's okay by me. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0">

Mockingbird
03-04-2005, 06:45 AM
I've been thinking about this lately, and I still don't have any symapthy for smokers who can't quit. Especially parents of a cf child. There are lots of stop-smoking aids out there, if one doesn't work, try another and another, and another until one does. And if a CF parent absolutely can't quit, then they can give the child up to someone who doesn't. I'm thinking an aunt and uncle, or grandparents, I'm not saying the parent has to give their child up for adoption and hardly see them again... Though if they can't stop smoking, maybe it's better they don't see their kid that much.

Think about it, If a cf kid has parents who smoke, the kid's probably gonna think smokings not THAT bad, and start doing it himself. No matter what the parents say, it's always their actions that rub off on us, whether we want it or not. Bottom line, there is absolutely no reason a child with CF has to live in a smoking household. Someone said just because a parent can't quit, that doesn't mean they love their kid.... well, I'm sorry, but it kind of does. I've been hurt a lot by people close to me who smoke, whether it be a friend or uncle or whatever. Even though they may go outside and everything else, it's still saying they couldn't go one night without smoking. Besides, the smoke gets stuck to things and the smell never really goes away.

Anyway, I'm not saying I hate people in my life because they smoke, 'cause I don't. I just perfer to keep those people at a bit of a distance. If people can't quit, that's fine, but I'm definetly not going to be visiting them, and I don't want them visiting me. And I think it should be the same for parents who smoke.... Until they can quit, their relationship with their child has to be long distance. I know that's never gonna happen, because people are way to selfish to be giving up their kids, even if the child's health is at stake, but I think that's the way it should be, anyway.

Jarod
22 w/cf

anonymous
03-05-2005, 01:53 AM
Let me tell u one thing, i am the sole caregiver of my child, i know when my child is sick. i know when my child needs antibiotics and i am the one who takes my child back and forth to her visits and also stay at every hospitalization! I am the one who has instilled in my child the importance of doing her vest 3 - 4 times daily!!!! and my daughter knows that i will always be there , no matter what!!! i do not smoke in our house, i do not smoke in our car and i do not let anyone smoke around my child, my child does know that smoking is a very bad habit for me, her and everyone else that smokes!!! She also knows that drugs and alcohol are bad habits too. My child is very HEALTHY for a CF child.

anonymous
03-05-2005, 02:00 AM
P.S. i think the smoking ban is a good thing

Mockingbird
03-05-2005, 04:53 AM
Why are you smoking, though? Is it that important for you to have a cigarette? It doesn't matter how much you do for your daughter, or how much you care for and love her, you're still smoking, and that's still going to affect your daughter, if not physically then emotionally. And if your child may know smoking is such a bad habit, but she also knows you smoke... It doesn't work. You can't have both. Give up one or the other, for your daughter's sake.

Emily65Roses
03-07-2005, 01:33 PM
Oh by the by... to the smoking mom, I have to say I'm pleasantly surprised to know that you think the smoking ban is a good idea. I imagine a lot of it has to do with your CF child, but it's very hard to come across a smoker who thinks the ban is a good idea. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">

thefrogprincess
03-07-2005, 03:48 PM
To the person who said Cf parents who smoke should have the kid go stay with someone else:

WHAT?!?! You obviously don't have kids and have no idea how difficult that would be. And besides that many people don't even have that option, or in my case I never would have agreed to that, my family is nuts.

Second all kids CF or not are going to be exposed to unpleasant things no matter what: smoking, drugs, you name it. What is the point of sheltering you kids? You need to educate them that these things are bad because if you don't they are more likely to get involved with them because they don't know better.

anonymous
03-07-2005, 08:51 PM
I think that giving up your children is going a little overboard, is it not? And to say that a smoking parent is going to affect a child emotionally when they grow up is also a little dramatic.

We all know that smoking is bad for us, so we really don't need the lectures about the evils of it. It is a bad habit to kick as is many other addictions. I have smoked for 33 years, never in the home, never in the car when my son wcf was there and no one has ever been allowed to smoke in my house. Both of my sons 27 and 23, have never smoked, although I can't say 100% that they never tried it in their teen years. I do know that they are certainly not emotionally scarred by me smoking. I am glad and proud to say that I finally kicked the habit almost two years ago now. The craving, I think, never goes away and yes I admit that I would really like to have one at times but I know that it would only take that one to start me smoking once again and that, I am not prepared to do.

luke
03-07-2005, 09:01 PM
Smoking is a very tough habit to break. For any one that is interested, I am a certified smoking cessation instructor and would be more than happy to speak with anyone who is ready to quit smoking.



luke 29/cf

Emily65Roses
03-07-2005, 09:20 PM
Smoking affecting anyone emotionally may be a bit dramatic, and quite unlikely, but it's also possible. I am a very odd case, and I'm aware of this. But every single cigarette my Mike has had in our relationship has affected me emotionally. I'm not even going to try to explain it here. And I will agree that, for the most part, for most people, it's overly dramatic. Just wanted to point out that it's possible.

And Luke,
Mike quit smoking several times in the last year and a half we've been together. His problem isn't the physical addiction, but that it's his coping mechanism. He's currently not smoking again, but it tends to come back every few weeks or months. He can't seem to get away from using it as his crutch. I've never smoked, and so I can't really relate to him firsthand on what it's like. All I know about how difficult it is, is what I learned from watching him over the past year and a half and seeing how nearly impossible it seems to be for him to stop. He knows that I'll do anything I can to try and help him, but unfortunately, that's not much. PS-- He's tried the gum and the patch and all that stuff. Since his bigger problem is the mental addiction, those don't do anything for him. If you have any tips to share, or anything of the sort, I'd love to hear them.

anonymous
03-07-2005, 10:18 PM
Smoke is the residue of your pleasure.
It makes my clothes and hair stink.
Beer is my pleasure..
Therefore, URINE is the residue of my pleasure.
How would you like it if I stood on a chair,
And pissed all over your hair and your clothes?!

Peace, Love, Guitars...
-Dave

Emily65Roses
03-07-2005, 10:20 PM
LOL!!!!!!

luke
03-07-2005, 11:45 PM
Emily,

You are probably right about the "mental" addiction; it is just not the nicotine it is the behavior. I always used this really bad analogy...I taught my dog how to sit a long time ago, now how am I going to train him to un-sit? The basic fact about nicotine is that it is out of your system in 3-4 days. So if he went that long without them he was no long "physically" addicted. The problem as with most is the habit. What to do to break the habit?

Identify when he smokes: example, most people smoke after meals or while on the phone. Have him write down every time he lights up and what he was doing when he lit up, this is referred to as trigger identification. The next part is behavior modification, now this is where it gets difficult. How are you not going to smoke while on the phone? The ALA recommends you trade a bad habit for a good one. So instead of smoking to keep his hands happy he might doodle or something. In stead of smoking after dinner he could grab a carrot or celery. In some instances the behavior is to hard to change and people have to change their life habits, such as smoking while drinking. If you can't stop smoking when you drink then you just have to quit drinking all together. This is the worst when it involves relationships, who wants to quit smoking when the only time you talk to your coworkers is on the "smoke break"?

Smoking is a very, very hard habit for people to quit. The number one thing I tell people is that all of the pills, gums and patches in the world will make you quit only help. Nothing will make you quit accept for will power.

I know this is very vague but it is pretty hard to illustrate in a paragraph, if you have any specific questions or concerns let me know.

good luck,


Luke 29/cf

Mockingbird
03-08-2005, 12:12 AM
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>thefrogprincess</b></i><br>To the person who said Cf parents who smoke should have the kid go stay with someone else:



WHAT?!?! You obviously don't have kids and have no idea how difficult that would be. And besides that many people don't even have that option, or in my case I never would have agreed to that, my family is nuts.



Second all kids CF or not are going to be exposed to unpleasant things no matter what: smoking, drugs, you name it. What is the point of sheltering you kids? You need to educate them that these things are bad because if you don't they are more likely to get involved with them because they don't know better.<hr></blockquote>

I know that's an impossible thing to do. i said that to make a point. And kids are going to be exposed to smoke, but that doesn't mean they should have to live with it. It's not about sheltering, it's about health.

Mockingbird
03-08-2005, 12:33 AM
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Anonymous</b></i><br>Smoke is the residue of your pleasure.

It makes my clothes and hair stink.

Beer is my pleasure..

Therefore, URINE is the residue of my pleasure.

How would you like it if I stood on a chair,

And pissed all over your hair and your clothes?!



Peace, Love, Guitars...

-Dave<hr></blockquote>

He he, that was really good. =-)

And yeah, everyone else, i know I'm being overly dramatic, but I really really hate smoking. This is something that's kinda personal to me; When i was a kid, I had a friend with CF. She was my age and her parents smoked. They didn't do it around her or anything like that, There a lot like the "good" smoking parents who've replied on this thread. It still affected her, though. I'm not telling people if they smoke their kids are going to be homicidal. For parents who smoke, just think for a bit what is the best for your kid? The last thing a cf kid needs is to be living with a smoker, whether they smoke in private or not.

I'm so sick of hearing somesone say, "I need a ciggarette, or Oh, the addiction is so, so bad. OPEN YOUR EYES. CF isn't an addiction, it's not a bad habit, it's something we were born with, and none of us had a choice. So, anyone who smokes, I really don't want to hear any more excuses. None. If you have a child with cf, and you smoke, then whatever, i'm never going to be able to convince you to stop. But the least you can do is admit that what you're doing is wrong.

jarod
22 w/cf

anonymous
03-08-2005, 01:19 AM
Dear Jarod,

Guess what? I do not think that i ever said that smoking was right!!! I know that I am wrong for smoking, like I said it is a bad, smelly, filthy habit. I have smoked for a long time ( not an excuse, it is the truth) I have tried a couple of different smoking aides and nothing has worked, I do also know that is has to be will power that makes me stop, but i do know one thing i totally disagree with you on giving my child up to anyone. I love my children very much (more thatn anything in this world) even SMOKING!!! and that is not just my opinion but the truth.

anonymous
03-08-2005, 01:20 AM
Just another quick thought, I wonder how many people with CF would have smoked if they never had CF... Guess what? no one really knows

ClashPunk82
03-08-2005, 01:40 AM
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Anonymous</b></i><br>Just another quick thought, I wonder how many people with CF would have smoked if they never had CF... Guess what? no one really knows<hr></blockquote>

I wouldn't smoke even if I didn't have CF. I find it disgusting and gross. Having CF isn't the reason I don't like smoke, I don't like it because iit's a nasty habit.

kybert
03-08-2005, 11:43 AM
its all fine and dandy for parents to say 'i dont smoke around my kid'. fair enough, your kid is safe, but what about the rest of the population who has to deal with you smoking in public? there are people just like your child and like us who will be breathing in your smoke. its a bit silly to imply that we would be off smoking a pack a day if we didnt have cf. if i didnt have cf my eyes would still sting, my hair and clothes would still stink, my nose would still be itchy and runny, id still feel like i was suffocating. im not one to purposely ruin my looks either, and that definately has nothing to do with cf. no point spending money on makeup and skincare just to spend more to undo it and end up looking 10 years older than i should with stained teeth and fingers. i dont think there is such thing as a respectful smoker. i have relatives who class themselves as respectful smokers but they are far from it. they will preach on and on about how people shouldnt smoke around me, but that 20% of the time when they are dying for that ciggie and they cant be bothered moving away, they couldnt give a stuff about how i feel. when the going gets tough, the smokes win hands down. there is not even any point in giving an ultimatum.

dave that it hilarious! perhaps i should fart in everyones face. thats the residue of pleasurable food.

Mockingbird
03-08-2005, 11:57 AM
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Anonymous</b></i><br>Dear Jarod,



Guess what? I do not think that i ever said that smoking was right!!! I know that I am wrong for smoking, like I said it is a bad, smelly, filthy habit. I have smoked for a long time ( not an excuse, it is the truth) I have tried a couple of different smoking aides and nothing has worked, I do also know that is has to be will power that makes me stop, but i do know one thing i totally disagree with you on giving my child up to anyone. I love my children very much (more thatn anything in this world) even SMOKING!!! and that is not just my opinion but the truth.<hr></blockquote>


That's all i ask. =-)

AngieM
03-09-2005, 02:26 PM
Here's a suggestion.... maybe give up the cigarette for a can of copenhagen or skoal. You'll get your nicotine fix and the rest of us won't have to smell your smoke.

Emily65Roses
03-09-2005, 02:36 PM
That may help the rest of us, but it's still an entirely vile habit.